When the coffee leaves my empty stomach and enters my bloodstream. It makes me want the whole pot because it makes me feel like I can do anything. THAT is why I’ve never done coke or heroin.
A myspace question asked: ‘have you ever smoked cocaine?’. I didn’t even know you could.
Which brings me to this: check these guys out: www.rideclean.net . Doug Loveday is doing something really cool here. His approach is admirable, just getting the word out without slander and ‘look at me-ism’. You should get some gear and get onboard if you believe in the cause. Mr. Clean and DeCanio, who I happened across on myspace last week, miss the mark somewhere. Although I like the message, I hate their delivery and I’ve been fairly vocal about that. They reek of that kid in school that got left out so they rebelled and shot everyone in some misguided attempt to prove some valid-ish point. Rideclean is an honest, trustworthy, legit organization.
I heard an interview on NPR’s Fresh Air the other day. The head of WADA was talking about drug use in all sports, but especially cycling. He mentioned some masking and doping techniques that were as foreign to me as smoking cocaine. God, desperation must be a bitch.
Speaking of athletes, I got called ‘talented’ the other day, told that I just ‘roll around in the desert, look at cactus, give it stick here and there, then call it a day and win races’. I argued that “I’m working harder than ANYONE else out there!!” and as I said the words, I had to finish with a snicker. I do work hard, but I don’t ever plan. He said he hated me. I don’t think he meant it, but back to my point: I suffer from extreme focus for short little bursts of time, like when I’m dead set on finishing the whole damn pot of coffee, or on competing at Philly, or on a project. The other times, I have to let go and blow off steam, or, just have fun. If I didn’t, I’d be tempted to do something stupid. I know my mind. This way works.
I got a great compliment from my boss yesterday. He said that I am the best problem solver he has worked with. I was honored, but immediately thought, ‘yea, that’s cuz I’m a pro at f-n up and have HAD to fine tune the skill of bailing myself out of shit I’ve gotten myself into’, but then thought that’s how I race and that’s how I design. How can I make this, this, and this, out of this, this, and this; make the goal out of the materials I have? I know the limitations, I wing it, I know the possibilities. I mess it up, I put it back together. I get lucky. I do what I can with what I have to make it work. That is sport. Pure sport.
Now go and try to make an airplane out of your body, or whatever you want to be.
BB